The Pinocchio Complex

Pinocchio Complex:  Question made to confuse, or befuddle someone.

If Pinocchio says, "My nose will grow now." What happens? A great Cretan once said; "All Cretans are liars." Is he lying or telling the truth?"

Ok, so this article actually has nothing to do with the Pinocchio Complex---but it is about Pinocchio.  I just thought the idea of the Pinocchio paradox was pretty awesome.  You can come back and think about it some more when you're done reading...


"Oh come, let us worship and bow down;  let us kneel before the Lord our Maker.  For He is our God, and we are the people of His pasture, and the sheep of His hand."  ~Psalm 95:6-7

I've slowly been reading the story of Pinocchio to the kids over the past couple of months.  We're only half way through and it's a wonderful story---but hard to read sometimes as well.  Not only is the language translated in sort of an old-fashiony way, (it was written in 1883 in Italian and translated to English in 1892) but the character of Pinocchio is much less likeable than the cute little puppet boy we know from the Disney cartoon.

Pinocchio finds himself rebelling against his father at every turn.  The real clincher (so far) comes when Gepetto sells his own coat to buy his son a spelling book so he can go to school.  Pinocchio turns around and sells the book so he can attend a puppet show.  After reading this part and sneaking a peek at the astonished looks on my kids' faces, I took the time, of course, to point out the sacrifices that good parents make for their children.  Even horribly selfish children who break their poor parents' hearts!

Every now and then, Pinocchio's "conscience" will pop up and try to steer him the right direction, but he's pretty good at beating it back down again.  I have a feeling that conscience is going to win, though.  We just got past the part where the ghost of the conscience tries to reason with him.  That "spirit" just won't be defeated!  (Maybe it's a Holy Spirit, hmmm???)

Oh, but aren't we all just like that self-centered Pinocchio?  Instead of being grateful to our Maker and obeying Him because of His great love for us, we often toss out His precious blessings in favor of our own pursuits.

Thank God for the Holy Spirit who relentlessly attempts to guide us back home to our Father!

"However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak;  and He will tell you things to come."  ~John 16:13  

Hope In Every Season is on Facebook!  If you like what you've read here, please follow me and keep up with the latest posts.

 This article was featured in the 97th edition of The Christian Home Magazine.

Also linking with:
Teach Me Tuesday @ Growing Home  
Titus 2's Days @ Time Warp Wife 
Tuesday Linkup @ Courtship Connection 
Women Helping Women @ Teaching What is Good 
Wisdom Wednesdays @ Simply Helping Him  
Wholehearted Home Wednesday
Encouraging One Another @ Deep Roots at Home 
Homemaking Linkup @ Raising Homemakers 
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Legacy Leaver Thursday @ Leaving a Legacy 
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Desire to Inspire @ A Royal Daughter 
Inspire Me Monday @ Create With Joy 

Hold Your Peace!

A peaceful evening in Morrow County, Eastern Oregon.

"You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.  Trust in the Lord forever, for in Yah, the Lord, is everlasting strength." ~ Isaiah 26: 3-4

"The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace." ~ Exodus 14:14

Hold your peace!

That's a phrase we use when we want to tell someone to "calm down", "get a hold of yourself"...or, simply, "HUSH!"

Surely there was a little bit of that connotation associated with the phrase in chapter 14 of Exodus.  The Israelites had just left Egypt and had found out that Pharaoh was pursuing them.  Instead of trusting God and his miracles thus far, they were freaking out and accusing Moses of leading them out into the wilderness to be murdered by Pharaoh's army.

However, there's another truth we can extract from these words.   

"The LORD will fight for you"...

How does God's method of doing battle differ from ours?

"You shall hold your peace"...

"Hold" = retain, hold on to, don't let go of

How much more peaceful would our lives be if we let God handle those things that rile us up?

The best of relationships will face frustrating times now and then!

Often times, my children will become frustrated with one another---usually it's one of the little ones not "obeying" an older one.  The angered child will try over and over to make the irritating sibling bend to his/her will.  When they finally realize the other is not giving in, there are usually raised voices and resentful attitudes.

I've been training them to try to discuss the issue nicely once.  If that doesn't get the desired result, they're to come to me and let me decide if they should let it go or if I should mediate and help them out.  This makes for a much more peaceful atmosphere in our home.

I think this is what God desires to do with us.  He is willing to mediate our disagreements---and to fight our battles---so we can hold on to our peace.

Since He is the Perfect One---and we are the messed up ones---wouldn't it make sense to let Him?

Hope In Every Season is on Facebook!  If you like what you've read here, please follow me and keep up with the latest posts.

  This article was featured in Issue #96 of The Christian Home magazine.

Linking with: Teach Me Tuesdays @ Growing Home
Titus 2sDays @ The Time Warp Wife 
Women Helping Women @ Teaching What is Good 
Courtship Connection 
Modest Monday @ The Modest Mom 
Encourage One Another @ Deep Roots at Home 
Wednesday linkup @ Wholehearted Home 
Wisdom Wednesday @ Simply Helping Him 
Homemaking Linkup @ Raising Homemakers 
Wise Woman linkup 
Legacy Leaver Thursdays @ Leaving a Legacy 
HomeAcre Hop @ The Self Sufficient HomeAcre 
Matrimonial Monday @ A Proverbs 31 Wife 

The Burden of the Blessed Life

Survivor's guilt. 

Have you ever felt guilty for being blessed in a way that many others aren't?  Perhaps you've experienced a life-threatening situation and came out unscathed, while others suffered less desirable fates.  Maybe you've been healed of a sickness that many are still suffering from.

Many times in life, we find ourselves sitting in the good seats watching, often without any ability to help, while our friends and loved ones walk through very tough times.

This is where I'm finding myself lately.

I've got parents divorcing.  I've got extended family divorcing.  I've got good friends divorcing. Even more heartbreaking, a dear friend just lost a much prayed for baby to miscarriage.

My soul hurts for these people that I love---that I have relationship with---that are going through such a very difficult time.

What can I do to help?  I can't save a marriage...or a baby.  I want to pray.  But have I been?  Not as much as I should be.

To be honest, I'm experiencing wallowing in survivor's guilt.

Of course, everyone's got problems;  but when I look at the petty things I'm walking through right now, in light of what's happening to those around me, I see there's just no comparison.

Out of my 10 pregnancies, I've only lost one to miscarriage.  Losing that baby five years ago was the most difficult thing I've ever gone through---but I've been healed--and I think 1 for 10 is pretty good odds.  The baby I'm currently carrying is, as far as we know, healthy and strong.  So why, instead of thanking God for blessing our children with health, do I feel such guilt that they're healthy?

As for my marriage, Jamie and I just celebrated 14 years!  We've known each other since we were 13 and have been very best friends since we were 16.  We have walked through all kinds of heart breaking situations together.  At times, it's been a really rough road---but we're together.  Neither one of us is going anywhere---nor can we fathom anything that would be big enough to separate us.  Why then, instead of glorying in that, instead of thanking God every day for holding us together, do I harbor such fear that this beautiful bubble that I live in is going to pop any day now?

I feel helpless to offer prayers, advice, encouragement---especially in the situations where my loved ones are, (in some cases) so easily willing to end their marriages.  Marriages that, in each instance, began in a church, asking for God's sustained blessing.  I feel guilty talking about my blissful marriage when these others are having such a hard time.  I feel guilty sharing happy milestones of my pregnancy when one of my dearest friends is mourning the loss of her own.

Can a person who is living the blessed life really imagine themselves in the shoes of their hurting loved ones?  I say yes.  Absolutely.

The reason it's called survivor's guilt is because those who feel it are the ones who've survived.  We've spent time in the same den of lions but somehow, by the grace of God, we've come out in tact.  However, unlike the Biblical Daniel, who came out of the lion's den untouched, we survivors have not come out without scars. 

SO many people tell me that I have the perfect life.  Many see me as having a perfect marriage. Perfect children.  They say I am doing everything right to ensure a "til death do us part" marriage and children who grow into godly, law-abiding adults.  As flattering as that is, it's not true.  Nothing, outside of God and his plan, is perfect.  As much as I desire those wonderful outcomes, I'm human---as is the rest of my family---and we all make mistakes that tarnish our lives and leave scars.

The reason that people probably see me this way is that I don't share my personal problems publicly.  When I have issues with my husband or kids, I go to them.  Not to Facebook.  Very rarely do I share a personal issue with my own mother---other than that, there's no one that hears our private junk.  I am, however, very quick to praise my husband or brag on my kids.  I want others to see them in the best light possible.  Would I want my husband or kids broadcasting my flaws outside these four walls?

The problem with all of this, and the burden of the blessed life, is that others think I can't relate.  They think I have this "perfect life" because I have steered away from every possible sinful thing out there.  They think that devastating circumstances have passed me by.

The truth of that matter is very far from this thinking.  I am very much able to offer support, advice, sympathy.  I can very much relate because I have survived.  More than that, I've been healed of the hurt that many of my loved ones are experiencing right now.

I remember the devastation, self-blame, anger, and fear that come with the loss of a child.

I know the feelings of confusion, hard-heartedness, and inadequacy that follow a betrayal.

I have thought the grass was greener in someone else's pasture and have even tested the theory to find it sorely lacking in substance.  More than once.

I recognize the scary cycles of an addiction that seems impossible to overcome.  I'm still cycling.

I've experienced a depression so deep that leaving my family or even ending my life seemed like very logical answers.  Several years of it, in fact.

Many people think that those who are living the "good life" are unable to be of any assistance to them when they're going through tough times.  They think that we live in some la-la land and can't relate.  They're sick of hearing, "well, just trust God and it'll all work out fine."  (In reality, we should all definitely trust God---but that doesn't mean it's all going to work out fine.  Sometimes it all falls apart and it really sucks...but he's still worthy of our trust.)

While there are many who will read this and either relate to where I'm coming from or will roll their eyes and say, "she has NO idea", what I really want is for those who know me to read it and understand something.  I can relate.  I want to help you. 

When you're going through hard stuff, don't be so quick to make assumptions about the people around you who want to help.  There's a reason they've survived and their survival skills might be just what you need.

Contentment Part Three: Finding Joy In Our Unique Circumstances

We took the kids to the park for baseball and a picnic on Sunday morning.  Me and baby Kynthia took the picture!

Hebrews 13:5  "Let your conduct be without covetousness;  be content with such things as you have.  For He Himself has said, 'I will never leave you or forsake you.' "

This is one that I don't feel like I deal with so much at this time in my life, though I've definitely dealt with it before!  I honestly can't think of anything that I covet.  Yay!!  This is a welcome reprieve for me in this series on Contentment!  Monday, I talked about worry---that was a convicting one.  However, yesterday's discussion on complaining was the big whammy!  It sounds like that one made an impression on others, as well, since I got a lot of feedback about it!

Anyway, back to coveting.

Mom taught me that the grass is not always greener on the other side, and it didn't take much life experience to prove that to be true!  With other people's "stuff" comes other people's junk.  I think the main reason why I don't deal with a covetous spirit very often is because I've come to realize that God uniquely made me to be able to handle/enjoy the blessings and trials that are in my own life.

The circumstances of my own situation dictate what sorts of things will be beneficial for me.  I don't have designer clothes like some because I have a new baby every year who would spit up on them and stain them! (I couldn't fit into them anyway since I'm always pregnant or recovering!)  However, I do have a lot of cute maternity things, as well as the ability to design and sew my own clothing, so I don't feel like I'm always donning a shapeless parachute!

I don't have a fancy sports car---because what I need is a 15-passenger van.  I don't have a sprawling mansion---because what I can manage is a modest, 4-bedroom home in town.  I haven't been blessed with extraordinary beauty and a flawless figure---because I have a personality that desires attention and the Lord knows that wouldn't be beneficial to me or my marriage!

I don't struggle very often with discontent in the area of greed because I am peaceful and happy in the life God has given me!  I know that God will never leave me nor forsake me---therefore, I can be content in knowing that he is working out the perfect set of blessings for my unique circumstances!

Did you miss Part One on Worry??  How about Part Two on Complaining?  Check them out and be blessed!

Linking with:
Loving Our Children Tuesday at Teaching What Is Good 

This article was written for the 61st edition of The Christian Home Magazine.  Check it out and be blessed!

Contentment Part One: Finding Contentment Instead of Worrying

A peaceful place near Wallowa Lake in Eastern Oregon

Contentment:  an uncomplaining acceptance of my currently unchangeable circumstances

Worry and anxiety cause discontent in our lives.  If we are anxious about our current state in life: husband's job, medical issues, children's disobedience, we miss seeing the good ways that God is providing for us and sustaining us.

Matthew 6:25, 34
  "Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink;  nor about your body, what you will put on.  Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about it's own things.  Sufficient for the day is it's own trouble."

In most cases, there's nothing we can do to fix our problems on our own.  When we turn our worry into contentment, we are in a better frame of mind to see the true magnitude of an issue and hear God's direction on how to deal with it.

We've heard that God will supply all our needs according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.  Futhermore, 1Timothy 6:6-8 reminds us "Now godliness with contentment is great gain.  For we brought nothing into this world, an it is certain we can carry nothing out.  And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content."

If we put aside our worry that we will not have the basics we need to sustain our lives, (food, water, shelter) we can begin to focus on our other anxieties ans see that everything else is an issue of trusting in God an being content with his plan.

Do you have a rebellious daughter?  What else can you do but pray for help and follow God's leading?  God's answer will be better than anything you can come up with on your own, so be content while he works it out.

Is your financial peace buried deep in unmanageable debt? All you can do is seek God's direction and follow his steps to get out of it.  Be content while he works out the process.

Matthew makes a good point when he writes, "Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?" (6:27)

We've got nothing to gain by giving into anxiety.  In fact, it's a major hindrance to finding peace and accepting the place God has us in for today.

What are some ways in which you practice giving your worries to God and being content where you are?

This article was written for The Christian Home magazine, Issue 59.  Check it out for lots of great articles from other talented Christian authors!

What Will Your Legacy Be?

Proverbs 27:6: "Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful."

Talk about prophetic!  How can we help but read this and picture our wounded Savior and Friend, Jesus, the Ever-Faithful One, contrasted with the deceitful and weak Judas who betrayed Jesus with a kiss?

Judas didn't leave much of a legacy.  In fact, if you had to chose one human being in the Bible who was most unfaithful and least deserving of Heaven, who would you choose?  Many of us, without much thought, would choose Judas, right?  After all, he claimed to be a follower of Jesus---which implies devotion, respect, love for Him---yet he easily betrayed the Lord for pennies.

***Enter Sarcasm***

Wow---I'm SO glad that I am not like him!  I would never do something as dishonoring to the Lord as Judas did.  I mean, can you imagine having unlimited access to the King of Glory---God in the form of man---and then throwing it all away just because you were afraid of what others might think about your association with Him? 

**cough**  **cough**  **cough**

Can you comprehend the thought of receiving any amount of compensation for betraying our Lord?  Judas's 30 pieces of silver were equal to about four months worth of wages.  Would that be worth it to you?

The truth is that we're all Judas.

How often do we betray Christ by distancing ourselves from Him?  Like Judas, we become disillusioned by the contrast between what our Christian walk really is and what we think we're entitled to.  When Jesus doesn't do things in our lives the way we think He should, we want to take matters into our own hands, like Judas did, and make it happen!  Of course, when we take action on our own, it pretty much always backfires---like it did with Judas.  When he betrayed Jesus to the authorities, he wasn't trying to get Him crucified.  He was trying to force Jesus into displaying His power and real authority---he was trying to start a revolution.

When we step outside of God's plan and direction, we're not usually trying to deliberately disobey Him.  We just want to get the job done faster, so we think we'll help Him out a little.  This only causes us to fall into a pit of our own making---one that is far from God and far from his plan.  We actually become enemies of God.

Often times, we find ourselves accepting the world's compensation for sin (betraying Jesus), when we know there's a better reward to be had for faithfulness.  Even though we've experienced Christ, we still gravitate toward what is comfortable or what we feel is safe.  Our head knows that God's ways are right, but our foolish hearts too often yearn for things that are less than God's best.  Like the "washed sow" who returns to her mud pit, so we often go back into our old ways---even after being cleansed by God's saving grace.  We allow the loud voice of the enemy to drown out the calm and quiet voice of God that says, "just wait---I have a plan!  Trust me."

If we want to avoid the same pitfalls as those of Judas, Peter, and others who walked with Christ yet denied Him later, we must be changed.


There are many verses that we know so well---so well that we often dismiss them.  We can rattle them off verbatim, but we haven't taken the time to get them into our very being.

"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2

Don't get me wrong:  it's essential that we know Scripture by heart.  However, we must make sure that these truths are actually in our hearts and are manifested in our actions.  How do we avoid the pitfalls of denying Christ and, instead, leave a legacy of faithfulness?  We stop conforming to the world.  Often times we think that this means we shouldn't act or think like the world.  It's more than that, though.  In addition, we shouldn't be concerned with how the world perceives us---when we know in our hearts that we are following God.  We must let God renew our minds and allow him to focus our thoughts on that which brings him pleasure.  Trust me, this is not going to look anything like the world we live in.  But, it just might make the world desire to know Whom we've got living in us.

This article was written for The Christian Post, Issue 58.

Awake O Sleeper

Proverbs 19:15:  "Laziness casts one into a deep sleep, and an idle person will suffer hunger."

I've been slowly reading through the Proverbs since August (yep, THAT slow!).  I want to really take in and process what each one is saying.  I want to get these truths into my heart, so I've been reading and journaling about almost every one of them.

Sometimes I really have to think on one of them to get the full effect.  This was one of those that caused me to stop and ponder the depths of the message.

How has laziness cast me into a deep sleep?  I know this doesn't happen in the literal sense, not for me anyway.  With 8 children aged 12 to infant, I don't get much sleep at all---and I don't think I've slept deeply since I was about 19 years old!

However, laziness has caused me to be "asleep" to some things that are going on around me.  It has caused me to be in denial about certain parts of my life that need attention.  Laziness keeps me from seeing things that need to be done and changes that need to be made.  These can be things as simple as household chores, or as important as correcting my children's behavior.  It is sometimes so much easier to just let the laundry pile up (either dirty in the basket or clean on the dresser) or let the kid's bad attitude go unchecked than it is to put the effort into fixing the problem.  I am ignoring the problem and I'm ignoring the future consequences that I know this laziness will bring.  What kind of example is this to my children and other people in my life over whom I have influence?  What kind of legacy am I leaving?

Pretty soon, my laziness turns into apathy.  I just don't care anymore.  I settle in my ways and am asleep to, and ignorant of, how much better life would be if I'd be proactive.

How will I suffer hunger from being idle?  To figure this one out, I need to think about what sorts of things I'm hungry for.  Here are a few big ones on my list:

*A more regular Bible study time

*A happy and peaceful attitude

*A healthy and fit body

*An organized home

*A more consistent homeschooling schedule

Every one of these things is not being accomplished in my life the way it could be because of idleness.  I become slothful and the apathy creeps in.  Often times, it's easier to stay in the place that I am than it is to step out and change.

However, God doesn’t want me in this place of idleness and apathy!   Instinctively, I know this---but this can be such a hard habit to break free from.   When I imagine what God says to me in this place, I remember Ephesians 5:14: “Awake, you who sleep, arise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.” 

Just a few verses before that, I’m encouraged to walk as a child of the light and to find out what is acceptable to the Lord (v. 8-10).  How else can I do this but to dig deep into His word and to spend time in prayer, calling on Him for help?

Looking back to my list of things I’m hungry for:  we’ve all been taught that God wants us to spend time in His word.  We know that he desires for us to have joy and peace in our life.  But, did you know that it matters to God whether or not my home is organized and my homeschool runs smoothly and my body is healthy and fit?  He knows the calm and contentedness that these things will bring to my life.  God really does care about these things that we often think he’s too busy to deal with!

Ephesians gives us some practical steps to start and continue walking as children of the light.  Verse 16 encourages us to “be wise and redeem the time.”  I love what Matthew Henry says in his Commentary about this phrase.  I know this is a little long but stick with me---it’s good stuff:

“redeeming the time (v. 16), literally, buying the opportunity. It is a metaphor taken from merchants and traders who diligently observe and improve the seasons for merchandise and trade. It is a great part of Christian wisdom to redeem the time. Good Christians must be good husbands of their time, and take care to improve it to the best of purposes, by watching against temptations, by doing good while it is in the power of their hands, and by filling it up with proper employment—one special preservative from sin. They should make the best use they can of the present seasons of grace. Our time is a talent given us by God for some good end, and it is misspent and lost when it is not employed according to his design. If we have lost our time heretofore, we must endeavour to redeem it by doubling our diligence in doing our duty for the future.”

How encouraging is that!  Our time is a talent given us by God.  What a great measuring stick by which to check ourselves and evaluate our days.  In another part of this section of commentary, Henry talks about the Christians who would “stir up themselves to their duty.”  I don’t know about you, but this encouragement makes me want to get up and buzz around this house, cleaning and singing and hugging my children! It motivates me and makes me want to kick laziness and apathy out the door!

It’s true that “the days are evil” as verse 5:16 goes on to say---they’re also short and time gets away from us faster than we’d like.  As Henry encourages, let’s all “endeavour to redeem it by doubling our diligence in doing our duty for the future.”  Think of the amazing legacies we could leave!

This post was featured in Issue #55 of The Christian Home magazine.

Linking with:  
L.A.C.E.  Wednesdays
A Wise Woman Builds Her Home

Compassion, Not Condemnation: Compassion Part Five

This is part five of a study on showing compassion to the unsaved.  Part One can be found here, Part Two is here, Part Three is here, and Part Four is here. 

When we understand and acknowledge what Christ did for us, we can extend that same compassion to others.   

Romans 5:6-8 says, "For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

We are called to compassion.  1 Peter 3:8-9 reads, "Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another;  love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous, not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing."

When speaking of the unsaved, the Bible calls them "sinners".  While we all sin on a daily basis, Christian or not, the distinction is made between those who will die in their sin because they've refused to accept Jesus as their savior (sinners), and those who are forgiven their sins when they ask with a repentant heart and will live eternally with Jesus (the saved).  So how did Christ treat sinners?

Matthew 23: 27-28: "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness. Even so you also outwardly appear righteous to men, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness."

During a sermon a couple months ago, our pastor said, "His scorn wasn't for sinners, it was for the religious self-righteous."

The Pharisees were equivalent to the hypocritical believers of today.  We can turn up our noses at the Pharisees' behavior, but how many times have we appeared beautiful and "having it all together" on the outside when we were actually dead and unclean on the inside?  Jesus despises the "Christian on the fence".

Revelation 3:15-16 says, "I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth."

Sometimes associating with a Christian who is sinning (walking in blatant sin but still claiming to follow Christ) can be a bigger danger than hanging out with an unbeliever.  The "Christian's" sins seem less obvious and we are quick to make excuses for them.  We are also quicker to forgive them than we are unbelievers.  Should there be a distinction?

When Jesus encountered the unsaved, he showed them compassion---not condemnation!

Luke 19:10: "for the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost."

John 3:17: " For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved."

This article was featured in Issue 54 of The Christian Home magazine.

Linking with: Faith Talking Tuesdays @ AudraSilva.com

The Separation Mentality --- Compassion, Part Four

This is part four of a study on showing compassion to the unsaved.  Part One can be found here, Part Two is here, and Part Three is here. 

In this fourth posting on showing compassion to the unsaved, I want to share with you a third reason why Christians aren't quick to give that grace to those who don't know Jesus.  It's something called the "Separate Yourself" mentality and many of us use it as an excuse to "get out" of "having" to witness to those around us. 


2 Corinthians 6:14, 17 says: "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?" and "Therefore,  'Come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.'"

But then, Matthew 28:19-20 says, "'Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.' Amen."

So, isn't that a contradiction?  Actually, no.  While it's true that we are to be set apart from those who do not live their lives according to God's Word, there is a difference between the "unequal yoke" of 2 Corinthians and the command to go out into the world and make disciples that Matthew is speaking of.  We can't be very good witnesses if we are so far set apart that we have no unsaved people in our acquaintance or circle of influence.  The "yoke" is a joining together: a covenant and strong commitment; such as a marriage or a close friendship.  You can only get so close with an unbelieving friend before the issue of religion gets in the way.

We can be separate but still be witnesses of Jesus' love and character.  In John 17: 14-18, Jesus prays concerning the disciples: "I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. I do not pray that You should take them out of the world, but that You should keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth. As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world."

In fact, by befriending non-believers, (keeping boundaries and self-control in place) we can actually be a positive influence and show Christ's love without initially saying a whole lot.  The Good Samaritan story is a great example of love and compassion in action (Luke 10:25-37).  While none of his words are recorded, the Good Samaritan is remembered by his actions.  Read John 13:34-35: "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another."  They will know we are Christians by our love!  This relationship built on good character and honest love for our neighbor will open doors for dialogue in the future.

This post was featured in The Christian Home magazine, Issue #52.

Give Them A Break!

Brotherly Love at the Coller House

2 Corinthians 5:12-21:

¹² For we do not commend ourselves again to you, but give you opportunity to boast on our behalf, that you may have an answer for those who boast in appearance and not in heart. ¹³ For if we are beside ourselves, it is for God; or if we are of sound mind, it is for you. ¹⁴ For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died; ¹⁵ and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.

¹⁶ Therefore, from now on, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him thus no longer. ¹⁷ Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. ¹⁸ Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, ¹⁹ that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation.

²⁰ Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. ²¹ For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

One of the well-known "new believer" verses is 2 Corinthians 5:17:  "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation..."  This is a compelling thought, but do we always treat one another as if that thought were true?

I think that we are hesitant to extend brotherly love and kindness to some of God's new creations if we are familiar with how they were in their "former life".  It can be difficult to imagine that angry father, alcoholic mother, or partying brother as a new creation, once they've received Christ and begun to change their ways.

However, we have been given the "ministry of reconciliation" and because God doesn't hold our repented-for trespasses against us, then who are we to hold others' against them?  

Christ reached out to us with a spirit of forgiveness and a desire for restored relationship.  We can honor God by doing the same to those around us who are looking forward to a fresh start in Christ.

In the story of the Samaritan woman in John 4:1-26, (read it...come back...) we are especially moved by verse 24:  "those who worship Him must worship in spirit and in truth."  Are those newly-saved, not-quite-squeaky-clean loved ones around us worshipping in spirit and in truth?  God will deal with the details in time.  Before anything else, God desires that hearts are his.  Don't be a stumbling block with a self-righteous attitude.  Join that loved one in authentic worship---you might learn something!

Truly, those around us who are making the good attempt to live Godly lives don't really need our approval!  They'll be just fine without us cramming our opinions down their throats.  Read this excerpt from Romans 3:

^"21 But now the righteousness of God apart from the law is revealed, being witnessed by the Law and the Prophets, ²² even the righteousness of God, through faith in Jesus Christ, to all and on all^[a] who believe. For there is no difference; ²³ for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, ²⁴ being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, ²⁵ whom God set forth as a propitiation by His blood, through faith, to demonstrate His righteousness, because in His forbearance God had passed over the sins that were previously committed, ²⁶ to demonstrate at the present time His righteousness, that He might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus."

In verses 22-23, we are reminded:  "For there is no difference;  for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."  Verse 26 points out that Jesus is the justifier of those who have faith in Him!

In God's eyes, our levels of sinfulness (high) and levels of worthiness (non-existent) are all the same---no matter how long we've walked with God!  "For you are all one in Christ Jesus" (Galatians 3:26-29).   

Rather than focusing on others' specks, thorns, and thistles, let's focus on putting this last verse into practice with everyone around us---no matter how new they are to the faith:  "Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one."  (Colossians 4:2-6)

This article was printed in The Christian Home magazine, Issue 47. 

 

Don't Misplace God's Glory

You know on Charlotte's Web, at the end, when everyone is singing the praises of Wilbur the pig: "He's Some Terrific, Radiant, Humble, Thing-a-Majig Of a Pig"... Well, I was contemplating that song recently, and realized something. It's not the pig who is terrific, radiant, humble, for crying out loud---it's the spider!!! The pig did absolutely nothing to make himself praiseworthy---it was Charlotte, his spider friend, who used all her gifts and abilities to make him shine. Did anyone ever think to give glory to the spider? Nope, she just gave birth to her most magnificent masterpiece...and then died. Talk about humility...

So, it got me (eventually) thinking about Hebrews 11. In this chapter, we find the Hall of Faith...all the great men and women of renown and all their worthy accomplishments in the name of faith. Not to discount these honorable brothers and sisters in the faith---but don't we see some liars here? Some murderers? Adulterers? I mean, when we look really closely, the things that make these people worth remembering are all the things that the Lord did in their lives by His power and covenant with them. It is nothing that they did on their own. They would be unmentionable nobodies---runts doomed to death---if it weren't for the Lord.

Now, I don't want to make a big deal out of what is meant to be an innocent and lighthearted story, I'm just using Wilbur's tale as an example.  We are warned about this practice of giving glory where glory isn't due in Romans 1:25 where Paul mentions the people "who exchanged the truth for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever."  


Sometimes God's glory can be misplaced and misunderstood.  The Lord does wonderful things through us and, often times, those around us see these wonderful things and begin to think highly of us.  It's fine for us to talk up our spouses or brag on our kids---as long as we ultimately give the glory back to God.  It can be something as simple as replacing, "My husband is so awesome.  He found this great job and is the best employee on his team," with something like this: "God is so awesome!  He blessed my husband with this great job and has helped him become a valuable member of his team."


Our family struggles with receiving misplaced glory a lot.  Our kids are well-behaved and converse well and politely with people of any age. My husband and I love each other and are one another's best friend---and it shows.  Our home is clean and welcoming.  Sometimes we feel like Wilbur, as those who see us from the outside tell us how great we are.  We have a responsibility to give that glory back to God, as we would have nothing and be nothing if it weren't for God's blessings in our lives.  Blessings we've done nothing to earn---but blessings, nonetheless.

I'm sure that many honorees in God's "Hall of Faith" would not have ever imagined that they would be known in history as faithful, loyal, Godly men and women.  Paul also tells us in Romans 3:23 that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."  Even though we all mess up and find ourselves in less-than-honorable situations, isn't it wonderful that we have the opportunity to ask Jesus to cover us, restore us and set us up in His Hall of Faith as well!


From now on, when I think of these "great men and women of faith", I'll remember that they are only known as "great" because of the One who lives in them---the only true Great One, Jesus!

This post was published in Issue #45 of The Christian Home magazine. 

(1/18) Linking With:  

Am I Complete?

Colossians 2: 8-10: "Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world and not according to Christ. For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily; and you are complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power."

How many times do we go looking for someone or something to "complete" us? If we are single, we say we need a spouse to complete us. If we are married, we say we need children to complete us. After that, we start saying things like, "If only I...was not so overweight, would gain a little weight, didn't have this debt, had a cleaner home, owned my own place", etc.

We have this sense that we, in and of ourselves, are not enough. We know that we are lacking, so we go on a quest to lose the weight or adopt the newest organizational system or find the perfect spouse. So why, when we do finally accomplish these things, do we still feel the empty spot? Why do we immediately recognize the next big thing that needs to happen for us to feel complete?

The problem is that while we know that we are lacking--that we, in and of ourselves, are not enough--we are going in the wrong direction to find that fulfillment. Verse 9 says "in Christ dwells all the fullness of the Godhead"--the Three In One--the Trinity...and we are complete in Him. We have been cheated and lied to--and we have bought right in.

The Bible gives us a caution--that we wouldn't be cheated or deceived by the traditions of men or principalities of the world. Have we made the world's deceptions our truths? Have media and magazine covers become our gospel?

The funny thing about God is that He knows our hearts. He knows and understands that empty place where we feel the need for completion. What's more, He knows exactly what we need to fill it. We can find all we need in Him.

Even in Christ, completion won't come by forgiving our brother or cleaning up our act. Yes, those things are important and that time will come, but it can't come until Christ has our hearts. Completion and fullness in God must first take place in our hearts as we surrender everything to Him and ask Him to teach us and to work on us in His timing. Once this surrender to Christ is complete and we are being filled by Him, we will begin to emulate Him. People will begin to see Christ in us as we forgive our brother and get our act together one step at a time through Christ.

My challenge for myself and my readers today is to not accept the lies and traditions of the world. Instead, invite Christ to fill you with his truth and power and find completion in Him.

I am honored to have had this article published in The Christian Home Magazine.  This is an encouraging online magazine that is published weekly.  Check it out!

Compassion, Not Condemnation Showing Compassion Part Five

This is part five of a study on showing compassion to the unsaved.  Part One can be found here, Part Two is here, Part Three is here, and Part Four is here. 

When we understand and acknowledge what Christ did for us, we can extend that same compassion to others.   

Romans 5:6-8 says, "For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

We are called to compassion.  1 Peter 3:8-9 reads, "Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another;  love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous, not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing."

When speaking of the unsaved, the Bible calls them "sinners".  While we all sin on a daily basis, Christian or not, the distinction is made between those who will die in their sin because they've refused to accept Jesus as their savior (sinners), and those who are forgiven their sins when they ask with a repentant heart and will live eternally with Jesus (the saved).  So how did Christ treat sinners?

Matthew 23: 27-28: "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness. Even so you also outwardly appear righteous to men, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness."

During a sermon a couple months ago, our pastor said, "His scorn wasn't for sinners, it was for the religious self-righteous."

The Pharisees were equivalent to the hypocritical believers of today.  We can turn up our noses at the Pharisees' behavior, but how many times have we appeared beautiful and "having it all together" on the outside when we were actually dead and unclean on the inside?  Jesus despises the "Christian on the fence".

Revelation 3:15-16 says, "I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth."

Sometimes associating with a Christian who is sinning (walking in blatant sin but still claiming to follow Christ) can be a bigger danger than hanging out with an unbeliever.  The "Christian's" sins seem less obvious and we are quick to make excuses for them.  We are also quicker to forgive them than we are unbelievers.  Should there be a distinction?

When Jesus encountered the unsaved, he showed them compassion---not condemnation!

Luke 19:10: "for the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost."

John 3:17: " For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved."