Friday, September 13, 2013

Submission vs. Obedience -- Guest Post from Misty at Simply Helping Him

Thanks so much to Misty from Simply Helping Him for guest posting today while I'm in England. I love this thoughtful article she's blessed us with today, and fully endorse everything she's written here. Thanks for being a blessing, Misty!

Obedience and submission; did you know they are different? Do you know what they both mean? K.P. Yohannan describes these words in his book, "Touching Godliness", as this.

"Submission is a heart attitude toward authority, whereas obedience is an action."

As help meets we are called to obey our husbands, and we are also called to submit to their authority. Choosing to fall under my husband's authority because I'm "supposed to" does not mean I am submitting. That is a choice, and is obedience not submission. 

In order to submit to our husband's authority, our hearts must be changed. We must allow God to work on our hearts, to bring them to the place where we submit to our husbands. 

Submitting to our husbands does not mean we are going to allow them to walk over us. We are still part of a relationship, in which we both are a picture of Christ and the church. It takes more than one person to create that picture. We are accepting that our husbands are in authority by submitting to them. They are responsible for themselves, their wives and family. God will hold them accountable for how they handled their families. 

Our husbands are a measure of protection over us. As women, we tend to be more emotional and make decisions based on feelings. A marriage relationship functions through communication together. It is this relationship that we can be protected when our husband senses our emotions and feelings are affecting our decisions. Our marriages will be off-balance and never reach the place God intended, should our hearts not be aligned with God's will for us as help meets. 

Submission requires selflessness and humility. Our wants and wishes must be given up, should our husband's blessing not be given. Choosing to listen to him and give up these things, demands humility. Without humility, our hearts aren't truly submitting. We must remember that our husbands are human, just as we are. 

Should you believe that God's hand is in a decision you brought to your husband, then there are 3 things you should do.  

1. Pray.

Ask God to guide you in how to re-address the topic with your husband.

2. Humbly talk to your husband (in God's timing).

Sharing your heart and how God has brought this to your heart.

3. Wait.

God's timing is perfect. Ours is not. He will work on your husband's heart.
Remember, obedience is the action and submission is the humble, selfless heart behind the action.

We have an amazing opportunity in marriage! To watch God's plan for marriage unfold before our eyes, as the beautiful masterpiece He created!

May we all become part of this beautiful marriage picture that God planned from the beginning of time!

Misty @ Simply Helping Him

I am living life unfulfilled with my hubby (and our lil blessings).  He is a self-employed fisherman, and a Mainah through and through.  Thus, we live in Maine.

I love to write!  I love to talk, though for some reason, when I do about things of importance, something gets lost when I speak.  Thus, I blog at Simply Helping Him!

I thrive on music, coffee, sweet tea, hot tea, reading, and gardening in my "spare" time!


  1. Misty, I appreciated this post. Thanks for sharing it.

  2. Misty, I love that you have talked about waiting here. I am learning more about waiting in my marriage and not saying the things that earlier in my life used to quickly trip of my tongue without a second thought. I am seeing massive benefits to our relationship and have so much more peace in my heart.
    Thanks for sharing at Essential Fridays.
    Mel from Essential Thing Devotions

  3. I just wrote an entire series on submission! I have been putting this into practice and it has blessed our marriage so much!! My husband has stepped up as the spiritual leader and it rocks!! Biblical submission is a choice and it's amazing what happens to a marriage when we take the roles that God intended for us and put it to practice His way!!


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